So I went around the world to learn this????

I have been back from the other side of the world for a week. I am still jet lagged which makes my hands shake & my heart sad. Weepy mess still.

Today with a circle of sweet friends I recounted my tales from abroad. Michelle shared stories of poor children in Peru who bought candy to share. I shared the story of an American tot who screamed if you touched his Cheerios. Cute Betsy summed it up best,"I am that American kid. I don't want my stuff messed with."

Bingo. That is SO me. I am that kid. My big girls are having a rough week. I can't fix it. I got my feelings cut to the quick today by a friend. I am still feeling my way around my emotions about my trip. Don't mess with my Cheerios thank you very much.

I knew I liked control & order & being adored. Did it really take a trip to the other side of the planet & week full of re-entry hell to remind me. Yep. I think it did....

Malaysia here we come....

I have been a weepy mess lately. Having no uterus, it is hard to track when I am really hormonal or simply a raw bundle of emotion. I can track it starting a few weeks into Sweet Beth's departure. I know she is not dead but just in Texas but I miss her.

I went to Little Beth's house in Birmingham this week. It truly should be in a magazine. It is so stylish but the amazing thing is it is also so warm, inviting & comfortable. Which is no surprise to me cause that is how she makes everyone feel- comfortable. She has loved me at my worst & yet always fills my cup to the brim with her love & laughter.

I got to be with big girl #1 who has grown into the most beautiful & amazing woman. She is so fun, funny, smart & full of love. Baby girl could not stand waiting to leave on Friday cause her big sis was on the other end of the car ride.

Big girl/little girl #3 and I leave for Malaysia in a week. It is a mission trip to rock missionary babies. I am beginning to panic. It is a twenty-seven hour journey to the other side of the world. Tonight we went to a service at our church where our church FAMILY blessed our travel & trip. I began to weep over the people who showed, especially as vast majority were there for my baby, who overcome with emotion wept in front of our friends. We then heard our beloved pastor talk about her fame as a babysitter & use her vulnerability as the point of his message. I am still scared but here are facts these three events have sealed in my heart & mind:
1. I am blessed beyond measure- by my real family & my "extended" family.
2. I am loved by people who take time to be real & vulnerable, therefore I have safe places to land.
3. Malaysia whispers with promise & opportunity and because I am blessed to be loved well, I can rest in excitement.

Other side of the world, here we come......